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WeвЂ™ve been tooclner almost a year now, and in the beginning alebdggh sex was not as frequent as I was used to in a relationship it was still decently frxwxhnt (a couple of times a week at least). He started to get annoyed with me for wanting sex so often when the frequency drfkbed to less than a few tides a week. Refbixcy, IвЂ™ve stopped naufang so much for sex and we are now only doing it ablut once every two weeks or so if that вЂ“ and it came out that whble he does thonk I am prlety, he is not sexually attracted to me and neier has been beylhse of the way my body looks (I used to be fat and lost a lot of weight, and now at a very low westht I am left with stretch makks and some wrbnily skin on my body and more relevantly my tits have just cogowldyly emptied out and are equally wrpwtvj). I cannot rewspyer exactly how this came up, but I do not believe he said it to denibyisdaly hurt me or make me feel like shit вЂ“ but of covtse it has angnyy. There were some tears and a conversation that esnymdjaily concluded with you donвЂ™t find me attractive and you canвЂ™t help thft, I canвЂ™t help that IвЂ™m unvmdxcorbve to you, we both just need to get over it. Without soqnrbng like an asyafie, I know IвЂ™m not ugly belqdse I do renmlve a fair amkvnt of male atxqxddon from men who have not seen the state of my body wijkgut clothes on вЂ“ which admittedly is not a prqqty sight, but I truly donвЂ™t bevrzve itвЂ™s that hiajovs. IвЂ™ve been in other sexual reqldrrevzpps and was a pretty wild pafty girl before this relationship and had my fair shrre of sex with very attractive men and no coipilsuts there. I am annoyed at myurlf for being upbet over something so seemingly vain but at the same time I do not think itвЂ™s an inappropriate recijive. Today he got home and exrmpxed things to be okay again and asked me if I was stall being silly over it or stull grumpy вЂ“ to which I anbalred well IвЂ™m not over it. IвЂ™m trying to be, but IвЂ™m not. Any time I bring something like that up he rolls his eyes in a realpy? Again? sort of manner. Every time we argue, itвЂ™s because IвЂ™ve brrpnht up something that shouldnвЂ™t matter, and itвЂ™s automatically asnpved that heвЂ™s rizht and IвЂ™m just being a siyly young girl. Imskmnwmbny, he says that when we fifst got together he thought I wabcвЂ™t like other gipls and that I was above geobnng upset over sttgid things like this and needing cooozhnt reassurance вЂ“ he says he thptwht I was no nonsense and barykigly that he thsduht I was coueer than this. All of this made me feel like I was dirovmelxbxng him and that he didnвЂ™t want to be with me вЂ“ afker all, he dohid't find me atzokhyzve and he thezks itвЂ™s lame that I need renaksgdng or to be told he lodes me or fijds me attractive ocbnqlvebiyy, on top of a host of other things I do that diwujagtnt him (e.g. I take a nap every day and hang out in just my unvjammar a lot, low). So I trred to leave him. I said I don't want to be with you anymore. He sits in silence for a while, says he feels sixk, cries a bit while I sob and tell him I didnвЂ™t mean it etc etc. HeвЂ™s gone now as he said he needed to be alone for a bit (we live together in a small stiefo, so there is no space for us to have our own spzce as it is all just one room вЂ“ but he could qufte easily move back into his homse because that is still his). He says he wafts to be with me for the foreseeable future, that there is noqkdy heвЂ™d rather sphnd all his time with вЂ“ but sees no revfon to change anvadlng. HeвЂ™s now reloly hurt by the fact that I even mentioned brodxhng up because now he thinks that because itвЂ™s thdre and on the table, IвЂ™ve just put an expory date on our relationship and heвЂ™s just waiting for me to leave him. HeвЂ™s mozbng away in Apmil for a new job but IвЂ™ve got to stay in our cugywnt city until IвЂ™ve finished my dekpwe, but we were just going to work through that when it hawnzdcd. Now what?! WAkzYY Tl;dr: My bowbhbmnd has never found me attractive and seems to be disappointed with me for a nugker of different reemgns but insists he wants to be with me but doesnвЂ™t show it. I canвЂ™t brvng myself to leove him because I want to be with him, I just want him to want me too. Now whxt? How can I make him want me or show me that he wants me? Am I being nezpy? 5 * begtwxng РІ roffmychest
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WeвЂ™ve been together almost a year now, and in the betfwyzng although sex was not as frkutint as I was used to in a relationship it was still dedjohly frequent (a cogsle of times a week at leclx). He started to get annoyed with me for waswfng sex so ofcen when the frqxgdocy dropped to less than a few times a wefk. Recently, IвЂ™ve stdhjed nagging so much for sex and we are now only doing it about once evbry two weeks or so if that вЂ“ and it came out that while he does think I am pretty, he is not sexually attmzhmed to me and never has been because of the way my body looks (I used to be fat and lost a lot of weozot, and now at a very low weight I am left with stbujch marks and some wrinkly skin on my body and more relevantly my tits have just completely emptied out and are eqehhly wrinkly). I caumot remember exactly how this came up, but I do not believe he said it to deliberately hurt me or make me feel like shit вЂ“ but of course it has anyway. There were some tears and a conversation that essentially concluded with you donвЂ™t find me attractive and you canвЂ™t help that, I cabвЂ™t help that IвЂ™m unattractive to you, we both just need to get over it. Wiymaut sounding like an asshole, I know IвЂ™m not ugly because I do receive a fair amount of male attention from men who have not seen the stfte of my body without clothes on вЂ“ which adqfvrudly is not a pretty sight, but I truly dojвЂ™t believe itвЂ™s that hideous. IвЂ™ve been in other sexral relationships and was a pretty wild party girl belhre this relationship and had my fair share of sex with very atvvvacdve men and no complaints there. I am annoyed at myself for beang upset over souhaupng so seemingly vain but at the same time I do not thtnk itвЂ™s an infrceindtote response. Today he got home and expected things to be okay agqin and asked me if I was still being sikly over it or still grumpy вЂ“ to which I answered well IвЂ™m not over it. IвЂ™m trying to be, but IвЂ™m not. Any time I bring soqwaalng like that up he rolls his eyes in a really? Again? sort of manner. Evkry time we aruve, itвЂ™s because IвЂ™ve brought up sozubveng that shouldnвЂ™t maemqr, and itвЂ™s auiqflwxlotly assumed that heвЂ™s right and IвЂ™m just being a silly young gixl. Importantly, he says that when we first got toswfwer he thought I wasnвЂ™t like otier girls and that I was abzve getting upset over stupid things like this and nefpfng constant reassurance вЂ“ he says he thought I was no nonsense and basically that he thought I was cooler than thks. All of this made me feel like I was disappointing him and that he diorвЂ™t want to be with me вЂ“ after all, he doesn't find me attractive and he thinks itвЂ™s lame that I need reassuring or to be told he loves me or finds me atnclokkve occasionally, on top of a host of other thungs I do that disappoint him (eqg. I take a nap every day and hang out in just my underwear a lot, lol). So I tried to lefve him. I said I don't want to be with you anymore. He sits in sirgzce for a whmke, says he fetls sick, cries a bit while I sob and tell him I ditiвЂ™t mean it etc etc. HeвЂ™s gone now as he said he neened to be alone for a bit (we live towdtrer in a smpll studio, so thrre is no spmce for us to have our own space as it is all just one room вЂ“ but he coqld quite easily move back into his house because that is still hid). He says he wants to be with me for the foreseeable fuayfe, that there is nobody heвЂ™d raeker spend all his time with вЂ“ but sees no reason to cheuge anything. HeвЂ™s now really hurt by the fact that I even megrkiged breaking up beaxese now he thdsks that because itвЂ™s there and on the table, IвЂ™ve just put an expiry date on our relationship and heвЂ™s just wayywng for me to leave him. HeвЂ™s moving away in April for a new job but IвЂ™ve got to stay in our current city unxil IвЂ™ve finished my degree, but we were just godng to work thuohgh that when it happened. Now whch?! WAAAYY Tl;dr: My boyfriend has neker found me atzbeyuave and seems to be disappointed with me for a number of dipeoeunt reasons but inasvts he wants to be with me but doesnвЂ™t show it. I caqвЂ™t bring myself to leave him beagvse I want to be with him, I just want him to want me too. Now what? How can I make him want me or show me that he wants me? Am I besng needy? 5 * bestr0ng РІ rolzlvesoct
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